Is It More Than What It Seems? (Part 2)

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Wale as Mike 

I’m lying in bed with this woman in my arms. All I can think about is Meagan…

I haven’t really talked to her since her date with that guy she went out with a week ago. I’m guessing it went well because she has not called me.

The doorbell rings. I immediately I look over at the time… It’s 9:01 AM. Who the hell is at my door this early in the morning? I slowly slid my arm from under her head and got up.

I put my shorts on and headed to the door. I looked out the peep hole to see Meagan. What is she doing here so early? “Fuck,” I said to myself as I opened the door.

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Dessi as Meagan

Meagan pushed her way into the house, “Why the hell did it take you so long to answer the door?” she said with an attitude.

I closed the door behind her and followed her into the kitchen, “I was sleeping”

Meagan replied with a sense of guilt, “Oh sorry, I thought maybe you were in here with a woman. I was trying to be noisy”.

Laughing, “Noisy for what?”

“You know how you are”, she said looking at with a cute smile.

“Why are you even up this early?” I said trying to get myself to fully wake up.

Meagan said with a big smile, “I really want to come over here and talk to you about this guy. I know it’s early but I had to talk to someone”

Sitting down I said looking at her, “what about this guy?”

She sat down in the chair beside me excited, “Okay so do you remember the date I went on last week?”

I said with a straight face, “uhhh yeah what about it?”

“Well the guy is a sweetheart and we literally have been spending crazy time together”

“That’s why I haven’t gotten any calls from you?” I said in my feelings about the situation.

“Sorry I just been preoccupied”, She said with a sweet grin.

“You didn’t fuck this guy, did you?” I asked with suspicion.

“What? Hell no! You know me better than that” she said a little confused.

Hearing those words, made me feel much better about the situation. The truth is if she said the opposite I couldn’t do anything about it. It’s the fact that I know she hasn’t gotten into anything serious with this guy. The question that keeps repeating in my head is; if she knew how I felt would she give me a chance? And I keep repeating the same answer. I know her response would be “NO!” because she knows about all my previous relationships that ended in destruction in full detail.

Meagan continued, “I don’t care how much I like him. I don’t give it up that easy”

“I know, I need to find me a girl like you”

She shook her head in disagreement, “You don’t want someone like me. You couldn’t handle the pressure to be in that type of relationship”

“I can handle that kind of relationship” I said in an aggressive tone.

“This coming from the man that can’t live without sex for more than two weeks, Mike I know you like the back of my hand. You like the thought of a woman like me but you could never deal with that type of woman on a serious level.”

Does she really think I can’t commit myself to one woman? This isn’t true, I can, I just haven’t found the right person that has made me feel the kind of love I want.

Meagan has always been the person I turn to for support and I now realize that she is who I want to spend the rest of my life with. How do I tell her that?

“I haven’t been in a relationship where I felt the need to wait. The relationships I have been in, in the past, were developed because of sex and some may have grown further but never serious. I just don’t believe in putting in time with someone that I don’t feel a certain love for. I’ll keep you around if you’re good at what you do but you aren’t going to be my wife.”

“Your wife?  You think about marriage when your dating?” laughing a bit confused.

“Yeah, when I think of getting serious with a woman, she must be someone I feel I can potentially marry”

Laughing, “You’re joking right?”

Mike has a straight face wonder what Meagan found so funny.

Meagan continued, “Oh, you’re serious. I would never expect you to say something like that”

“Yeah I realize that now” I replied pissed about where the conversation was heading.

There was an awkward silence for a second as Meagan scrolled through her phone then looked up and said, “Okay, I’m going to go now. I’ll talk to you later”. Meagan got up and walked out of the front door. I wasn’t happy with the way Meagan and I ended our conversation together. I feel as though she has a negative image of the person I am, but who can really blame her. I got up and locked the door behind her just then Kelly came walking out of the room in my tee shirt.

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Kelly

“Who was that?” Kelly asked pointing to the door in suspicion.

“It was a friend” I said walking away from the door.

Kelly repeated my words in suspicion, “A friend”

I nodded my head “Yes”.

Kelly replied, “If it was a friend why didn’t you introduce us?”

“You were sleeping babe; I didn’t want to walk you up”

“So was this friend a male or female?” looking Mike directly in the eye with her hands folded.

“What?”

“You heard what I said” She replied waiting for his response

“Why does it matter?” I said walking to the bedroom

She followed me into the room pissed, “Because if it was just a friend you would have let me see them. Yes or no?”

“I told you I didn’t want to wake you up”

“Bullshit, you’re a fucking liar. Why do you always do this shit?” She said with her eyes tearing up.

“What did I do now?” I said shaking my head in irritation

“You tell me about how much you care and love me, then you do disrespectful shit like this. If you don’t want me just let me know and I’ll leave you alone” she said as the tearing rolled down her face.

“If I didn’t want you, you wouldn’t be here right now” I gently pulled her close and wiped her eyes, “I love you and I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you”.

Why the hell did I just lie to her again? I won’t lie I do care about Kelly but I’m just not in love with her. I hate to say it but she’s just my distraction. I just can’t stand to see her in front of me crying knowing I’m the one causing it. I rather just tell her what she wants to hear to ease the situation.

“Are you sure?” she said sniffling and wiping her eyes again.

“Yes, I love you”, I said I kissed her on the lips.

This brought a smile to her face but hurt me deep inside. Kelly gets what she wants but when will I ever get what I want?

 To Be Continued…

Is It More Than What It Seems? (Part 1)

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Wale as Mike

I watched her as she is on the couch sleep with her long black hair laid across my legs. She is a beautiful woman that I have the pleasure to spend endless time with. She could have been anywhere, but she’s here with me. Every time I look at her, she makes me want to be a better man not because I want her but I know her heart is genuine. Everything she says and does make me think about everything I have done.

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Desi Renae as Meagan

Meagan opens her eyes and turns her head to look at Mike who quickly looks at the TV as if he wasn’t watching her, “How long was I asleep?”.

“About two hours”, Mike replied.

Embarrassed she said, “Why didn’t you wake me up?” sitting up on the couch.

“I didn’t want to bother you”.

Meagan began looking around, “Where is my phone?”.

“It was about to die so I put it on the charger in the room and it rang a few times too”

“Shit”, she got up and ran to the room.

After retrieving her phone she walked back into the living room scowling down her call list then called someone. She put the phone to her ears sitting on the arm of the couch. The phone rang four times before a male voice answered, “Hello”

“Hey, I just saw you call. I’m at a friend’s house and loss track of time. Do you still want to go?”

“Yeah meet me at 9”, the voice on the other end replied.

She replied with a big smile, “Okay see you soon”

“Alright Bye”

Meagan started putting on her shoes and grabs her purse. Mike asked Meagan interested, “Who are you going to meet?”

“This guy I met a few weeks ago ”

“Where did you meet him?”, he said waiting for a reply

“Why does it matter?”, she said in a skeptical tone.

“You do know some guy have expectations on the first date?

“Who said this is the first date?” she said looking up at him smiling.

Mike nodded his head. He then grabs a pen and paper handing it to Meagan, “What’s this guy’s information?”

“Mike get a life”, Meagan said rolling her eyes.

“I’m serious. I would prefer the full name and cell phone number”

“I’m also serious, get al life”, she said grabbing the pen and paper placing it on the table.

They both walk to the front door silently. Mike holds the door open as Meagan walked out. Before she left she turned and looked at Mike.

Mike says, “Be careful, I don’t trust these guys”

“Because you know what you do?” Meagan said smiling.

“We’re not talking about me, we’re talking about you be safe”

Why am I talking like this? I’m never the one to ask anyone about their personal life.

Meagan paused and smiled, “Its cute when you show so much concern for me” She stands on her tippy toes and kisses him on the cheek and whispers, “I will be fine”.

Meagan walks off and Mike closes the door but stands in the same spot thinking.

Meagan and I have been friends for years but just recently these uncontrollable feelings have been taking over. I want to tell her but I don’t want our relationship to change. I respect and love her; the last thing I want is to push her away. The more time I spend with her the stronger my feels get. I can’t tell anyone about this because this is just not who I am. I don’t fall in love. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think I’m in love with Meagan.

To Be Continued…

NEW MUSIC: Yo Gotti Ft. Ne-Yo & Wale – Respect That You Earn

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I really like this song. Everything that they are speaking of is true. The only way you will get respect from a man is if you respect yourself and body. As a women you can’t go around doing anything then get mad when a man doesn’t respect you or treat you like a *** and you never want that. Tell me what you think of the song…

Wale Talks Love, Lebron, Being An Emotional Artist & Issues With Fame

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Earlier this week, during a promo run for his new album The Gifted, he stopped by Nitecap with Peter Bailey to talk about his new project as well as how he’s been affected by fame in the last few years.  The conversation eventually ventured into love with Wale admitting that he doesn’t have a girlfriend currently because of his attitude, selfishness and greed.

He also admits he is trying to figure out what love is while saying that he can’t wait until he is able to experience fatherhood because he believes he has more than enough love to give to his kids.

Catch a few highlights and video below:

On why he can’t keep a girlfriend
[…] Because of my attitude, my greed. The nature of a man I embody that. I’m a living embodiment of all the flaws, greed, the selfishness. I’ve got all of those things. I’m just knowledgeable enough to speak on them and I’m secure with where I am in my life. A lot of men keep it inside or are living in denial. I just live my life that way.

On love
I went through years at a time where I didn’t even really believe in it. I thought it was all chance and chemical imbalance. It was kinda euphoria, when its like the right time, the right place, the right shape, the right situation. When you think something is going on in your mind and in your heart but in actuality its all lust. As growing I’m still trying to figure out what love is to me. But I think it is different to everybody though. I really do think there’s a different internal definition that’s beyond words for everybody [and] for what love is. There’s relationships where people really can feel love but there not magnums. So, everybody’s description of love might be different and I’m still trying to figure it out.

On showing emotion
Emotion is a taboo in hip hop. I don’t know when that started. But I just feel like we are supposed to be poets and we cant sing and do all that – emotions is suppose to come through our words. So when you take that emotion away, you’ve got a bunch of sh*t that’s monotone and you’re not really feeling nothing. […] I feel like emotion is good in hip hop. [They’ll say being emotional] is like being a woman or whatever. That’s how it is. […] I’ve come to grips with the fact that I’m kind of an emotional person. That’s what makes me make songs like “Lotus Flower Bomb” or a lot of things people fell in love with on my mixtape.

On the one thing men need to stop doing
I just feel like we just can’t keep running away. I can’t wait until I have kids because I’ve got so much love to give them. That’s going to be what’s going to give me that peace that nothing is ever going to be able to give me. We just can’t keep running away. A lot of times women do add to it now too, like women, a lot of them like to manipulate men and use their children as pawns. I always say, ‘Why use you’re child as a pawn, when there should be a king and queen?’ Like, a lot of women will be like, ‘Oh, you’re not going to come and pick your child?,’ when in actuality they really wanna say, ‘You’re not going to come over and make me feel okay or give me some type of attention? I’ve put on this weight since this baby and I ain’t been looking the same and my self-confidence ain’t what it used to be and I need some type of attention.’ That’s what it really means sometimes. They tried to make it seem like the [guys] don’t care about their child or whatever. But for the most part, black women can’t keep running away. That’s a cycle that’s been around for years.

Read more: NecoleBitchie
I love the fact that Wale is so honest with himself. OnPoint!

NEW VIDEO: Wale ft. Tiara Thomas – Bad

In the ‘Bad’ video Wale has a love interest, who is played by Eddie Murphy’s daughter Bria, that doesn’t want to attach emotions to her sex sessions. She has more fun with her girls and occasionally having bathroom sex with a sex guy she just met. It seems as if she is trying to find herself in the mix of all her sexcapades that means nothing.

This is a situation I find that most females are in now. Its sad but true.

The video was well executed. Love it! OnPoint!